Book Three — What the "Community" Says
(4/35) — Book Three
What the "Community" Says
About Tom Jensen and his Collaborhythm Collabtunes 34 Albums of Lyrics collection:
Jeff Winger —
"The world is a sick place, full of sick, sick people!"
Professor Ian Duncan —
"This is why I came to America!"
Starburns —
"My name is Alex Osbourne and if you're watching this it means I'm dead."
Troy Barnes —
"I'm high as hell and you're about to get shot!"
Annie Edison —
"I am not okay!"
Pierce Hawthorne —
"Oh, gay. Gay, gay, gay. So gay. Dark nightclub. Oh, throbbing music. Men's room stall. Penis. Two penises!"
Magnitude —
"POP POP!"
Ben Chang —
"Gay!!!!!!"
Britta Perry —
"It all starts with a quick look-see into someone's bag, and then it's a peek-a-rooni at our phone records. And before you can say '1984', the Thought Police are forcy-worcing you to bend and spread!"
Troy Barnes —
"Do they find thoughts in our butts? I knew I should have read that book!"
Professor Ian Duncan —
"I'm fairly certain this is illegal."
Jeff Winger —
"I don't believe in God, but I do believe in this…"
Pierce Hawthorne —
"I'll show you the tool that's most important to our survival, but fair warning — it's my penis."
Abed Nadir —
"I don't believe in fate… but I do believe in patterns."
Britta Perry —
"I'm just trying to survive in a world that doesn't make sense."
Ben Chang —
"I am a god of chaos."
Shirley Bennett —
"I don't understand anything, but I respect it."
Troy Barnes —
"I don't know what's going on, but I'm enjoying it."
Abed Nadir —
"This is the darkest timeline."
Pierce Hawthorne —
"Streets ahead."
Pierce Hawthorne —
"If you have to ask, you're streets behind!"
Troy Barnes —
"I'm in!"
Britta Perry —
"I'm a psych major. Words are my weapons."
Shirley Bennett —
"I'm addicted to encouraging white people."
Britta Perry —
"I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty."
Shirley Bennett —
"That's racist."
Pierce Hawthorne —
"No it's not."
Shirley Bennett —
"Yes it is."
Pierce Hawthorne —
"No it's not."
Dean Pelton —
"This better not awaken anything in me…"
Jeff Winger —
"I feel like I've been in a paintball fight for my soul."
Britta Perry —
"I don't do emotions well."
Troy Barnes —
"I do emotions TOO well."
Annie Edison —
"I am trying really hard here."
Annie Edison —
"I don't want to be the person who gives up."
Jeff Winger —
"I discovered at a very early age that if I talk long enough, I can make anything right or wrong."
Dean Pelton —
"I'm a cat. I'm a sexy cat."
Abed Nadir —
"Cool. Cool cool cool."
Shirley Bennett —
"That's nice."
Troy Barnes —
"That's wrinkling my brain."
Britta Perry —
"I can't think of anything to say."
Jeff Winger —
"You are human tennis elbow. You are a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth."
Dean Pelton —
"I have the weirdest boner."
Troy Barnes —
"I'm out."
Professor Ian Duncan —
"I think I've made a terrible mistake."
Abed Nadir —
"When characters feel like the show they're on is ending, their instinct is to spin off into something safer."
Professor Ian Duncan —
"True, all life ends in death, which we as a species are cursed with knowing, resulting in... something. Again, this is really not my field."
Jeff Winger —
"I know it's sad, but death is a natural part of life and by the time I finish this sentence, a hundred people will have died in China."
Troy Barnes —
"(then) Why………... did you stop talking? I have to call my pen pal!"
Jeff Winger —
"You're special. And not in a good way."
Pierce Hawthorne —
"Coined and minted."
Abed Nadir —
"Six seasons and a movie!"
Troy Barnes —
"I'm back in."
Ben Chang —
"I'll allow it."